To masturbate & cum - Only achievable if I think about a certain something that I DID NOT / WOULD NOT enjoy doing with a Partner, just because "My brain is wired" that way based on some Porn~y scenes I've seen on a screen when I was little. !MAKES NO SENSE!
WHY DO YOU TORTURE ME EVERY DAY LIKE THIS IT HURTS TOO MUCH I FEEL I ABUSE MY MIND WHEN I DO IT I CAN'T...
I can't even have a real friend
A real partner
Or truly trust anybody
Yet I still have to PROVE WH0(ZzzZzzeRRRRRRO!) that I can FOCUS on IMAGINING PORN SCENES In MY OWN head without wanting to ever have to do anything like that with my body FOR REAL? WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?
If this would be the only pain in my life, it would be big ENOUGH. But it's just a sprinkle in the shit you serve me on a daily basis. A WASTE OF... EVERYTHING.
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