What a weird day

Squeak's a little piggy,

That sure likes her treats.

So roam she will,

The Halloween streets.

Poisoned by candy,

Squeak met her demise.

Loaded with sugar,

Now covered in flies.

Look: Doll.

Name: Squeak

Brand name: Living Dead Dolls

I have some nice memories around this topic, including box.

Keepsakes from something that definitely broke. 

I met...Lines today? Addresses? Whose body?

Some things were fun, while others were downright MEAN. Learned nothing but validated some of my past sayings. And... Felt pain... The fun wasn't really 'allowed' to be fun, either. Nothing new. More pain. By who? DO I even care at this point? Not sure, but has to do with THE ONE (The WRONG one).

Previous blog articles on about or around this Topic:

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/06/i-dont-want-to-charge-you-with-my.html

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/07/latelies.html

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/09/nightmare.html

Oh no! Look

♥

Cute double set of ears ^^

Inimoasa, ha?

I was doing something else than what I saw now. 

Now I saw myself spinning, dancing on some music that I don't particularly enjoy.

Finger between buttons reversed.

.

Very Symbolic songs, about some Strangers. 

We are all intricately poisoned in here.

*sigh* (I sighed)

Thank you for whatevering with me though. I wanted to say something like, some things really are priceless but words are not good enough when .. ..... .. .......... ... .... ..... .. .... ..., ......... ... ... . ...'. know .... .. .. ..... .. .

Bye4now

********************************************* 

Finds

Hello!

|

|

|

Snap Kiss!

Symbols? What is a way without a will and what is that disguised as one?

I remember the tree...

♥

It was a night. {Last year}

A pleasant night, at least while I was there..That night... Almost night... What was it, anyway.

Friendly vibes in my ol' hood.

Oh, I saw you like a treasure, a hidden treasure. Stream of inspiration for moments that pass by too quick...

Changing the orientation of this pic and I get woozy with all sorts of thoughts. Lovely find though ♥ 

Thank you for being so nice, little corner of nature in the concrete jungle I'm still confined to.

I don't know why this particular leaf caught my attention.

I saw names of people I know under different nicknames and OH I'm still confused about that.

Hello, though.

I have a thing for this apparently abandoned thing.

Seeing beauty in the most unexpected places!

Nostalgia..

~

~

~

Din jurnal:

12.12.20 12:12 AM. (was random)

Bleaching my hair... Blond me... Where's the e? :p

I'll get used to it I guess. Hopefully soon I'll try the green colored hair I had in mind a few years back... But I want a medium green not pastel like, we'll see. For now I have to get used to this look. I always thought that Hey! I do not have the face of a blonde (?). Eh... Maybe I'll learn more about the meanings of blonde other than... Locomotive :-<

No? You mad? What? Are you serious? No! I don't accept this as answer.

~

♥

Take care,

M.A.

 

Gânduri

Din jurnal

10.12. [...]

Am ajuns sa vb cu tine asa...Degeaba... What tides? Nothing... Hurts too much... Fa ceva, macar sa iti inteleg NUurile, deja mi-ai zis nu si la asta... De ce? CE VREI DE LA MINE? Nimic nu e niciodata suficient... 

[...] Eu nu am ce sa fac. Sunt ca ei, nu sunt ca ei... Pt cum sunt eu, ce e? 

[...]

Cum sa iti fie dor de mine daca nu esti nicaieri? Fețele vorbitoare... M-am săturat de ele... Vreau o pauză... Parcă suntem intruși în mințile noastre, între ele... Deci..

A partner in crime is all I want, but no hidden catch (stupid game)...

You have so much data about me & u still don't know why I hurt...U show me | - | which might sound true but... I'm more. Eu ar trebui sa aleg ce salvez si ce sterg... Din mine... Nu altii... Mai ales altii care nici macar nu ma cunosc / n-au de-a face cu mine... Sunt la fel ca acum 16 ani. D.p.a.d.v. Cum mai, cum? Atata timp...Degeaba...

[...]

Eu cu cine pot vbi? Vad ca astia TOTI nu fac altceva decat sa cante in struna Altcuiva... Lupta? There's NO LOVE there... In iubire, nu e niciodata nici o lupta... Nu mai vreau sa traiesc ca sa experimentez astfel de minciuni, scenarii, umilinte.

 ~

I'd put my heart on your nightstand... If only you would listen... With no hidden ears. (Fucking my ex's meat suit it's not u! Magic is not done this way.

[...]

Oricum ai pune problema, daca joc teatru, hranesc ori pe unii, ori pe altii, cu care nu sunt de acord. Simt... Deci... Ce imi ramane sa fac?

Pics of my feet.

Be well!

The weirdest dream

~

8.12. Almost 5 AM! Had the weirdest dream !Whoa! "woke up" in the dream being fucked (spoon) by a guy that was asleep. He seemed older than me & there was smth unpleasant about him. His dick was penetrating me weirdly, as if his body wasn't even moving. V fast fucking & it felt so odd. "like the best sex that's also the worst" - A RAPE! I felt raped. However, I thought... Hey, it's for a reason... So I started visualizing (similar to what I do when I masturbate). I saw his dick as a fabric, with 4 corners coming close to the middle... The feeling was extatic … And it's not that I didn't allow myself to enjoy it... But... I felt raped (???).... So a dream within a dream (within a dream) I screamed... And stopped that thing. He woke up & morphed into smth more familiar... We got out... 

[...]

Opened it to reveal a beautiful, wonderful dress... Silvery with shiny snowflakes. I couldn't wait to try it on [Lol]

•Woke up weird / stupefied, but had a feeling of love when I thought about that dress. Like a message of sorts. What could it be? In this dream... I felt invaded. On one hand... Someone (if only I knew WHO) was trying to tell me something; but also invaded by creeps & their opinions on sex & pleasure; Something weirdly wrong... If only I knew what... A most dubious dream ♥♥♥

Afara ninge frumos...

in the p.m. Sunt suparata. De prea multe oriam auzit clar cum ticaiturile ceasului sunt mai rapide decat ar trebui. Nu stiu de ce (nu cred ca vreau sa stiu) dar sunt sigura ca are ceva de-a face cu "mine" [viata], Matilda, + alte dubiosenii.

Pfftttt.

Mac-Mac, sau Quack-quack

......................

~

:p~

*

:">

View from balcony.

What was I thinking?

^^

♥

Collarbone?

~

My oh my do you wanna say goodbye?

To half the Kingdom, baby, tell me why?

My oh my do you wanna say goodbye?

To rule a country, baby, you and I?

{Aqua}

So sad... Just lies... And so little in between... Hidden... By whom? From who? Till when?

Mai da-mi putin timp...

Dar eu nu stiu cum sa fac asta(?)

Sa traiesc in zadar inseamna ca iti dau tie timp?

Cine esti tu, oricum.

Si cum sa te respect, cand totul e ascuns stupid...

Nu pot sa fac nimic cu adevarat.

Si tot ce fac e degeaba..

💋 - Oh, ce ti-as face.

Sa te prind n-am cum, caci nu sunt intinderi carora sa la mai zic "Drum"...

Por una cabeza

Por una cabeza - Carlos Gardel ~ 

Por una cabeza de un noble potrillo

Que justo en la raya afloja al llegar

Y que al regresar parece decir:

"No olvides, hermano,

Vos sabes no hay que jugar"

Por una cabeza metejón de un día

De aquella coqueta y risueña mujer,

Que al jurar sonriendo

El amor que está mintiendo

Quema en una hoguera todo mi querer.

Por una cabeza

Todas las locuras;

Su boca que besa

Borra la tristeza

Calma la amargura.

Por una cabeza

Si ella me olvida

Que importa perderme

Mil veces la vida;

¿Para qué vivir?

Cuantos desengaños, por una cabeza,

Yo juré mil veces no vuelvo a insistir

Pero si un mirar me hiere al pasar,

Su boca de fuego, otra vez, quiero besar.

Basta de carreras, se acabó la timba,

Un final reñido yo no vuelvo a ver,

Pero si algún pingo

Llega a ser fija el domingo,

Yo me juego entero, qué le voy a hacer.

Por una cabeza

Todas las locuras;

Su boca que besa

Borra la tristeza

Calma la amargura.

Por una cabeza

Si ella me olvida

Que importa perderme

Mil veces la vida;

¿Para qué vivir?

https://youtu.be/SJ1aTPM-dyE

No.

 I still don't like masturbating.

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

The idea is not to like it.

My idea is that hopefully I will be 'allowed' to stop doing things like this asap.

Why?

Why is everything the way it is?

Heard countless stories.

Didn't like the ones that we're most Confident when telling them lies to me...

*Sigh*

I...

I..

I miss...

Something.

E?

 

Ochi imi zambesc din umbra

~ A guy mentioned this place where I go to for interesting affordable book finds even before I found it. Again, makes me wonder about time, space and how certain people talk around me / what I hear.

Thank you for this wonderful Instagram combobulation.

Am privit..

Am ascultat..

Am visat ca sunt si eu asa.

E? 

•

•

•

In days like these, I keep thinking how the brainwash [!Education! with "] I've been subjected to is thicker than I know or can see. Hands...Hands...What are hands... What do they mean for... Wait, WHO are they?... I don't want to disrespect or improperly categorize; Oh, you do not wish to be categorized, but look, how we communicate through words, here, so... Something does that to us already... What's between my hands? What's a pinch, cause I can make myself feel some more or less pleasant ones... Every time I chat with friendly peeps online as of late, I keep feeling how THEY KNOW SOMETHING I DON'T and at the same time we're clueless on both sides about certain things...

A...hand...? ..H...How?

https://www.instagram.com/p/CF7JwA2H_Ij/

When I drew that, I thought about a sort of separation, something that has to do with M/F stuff. Not able to really kiss. (Makes me sad).

~

4.12. *2nd time I go to the park and 'lose' a feather.

Gasesc produsul cautat la produse care nu erau nici ele pe lista - Thanks! 

-so weird- HA!

Fac prima supa de cand m-am mutat aici. Ma simt cam aiurea,din cauza ca... Bla bla... Ce-o sa fac mai incolo... Alte chestii imi plac. Nice book finds, again. Last night before falling asleep I was speaking (sleeping) in my mind and I felt listened [to]. Understood? I'm not sure. Today somebody without a body told me through a line in a book I was looking @ that... He (?) told me more about himself than he wanted to. ??? Hello, Mr. I'm still clueless. Tongues - Missunderstandments - The nothingness continues. {Why do I feel the ticking of the clock louder sometimes?}

Oh, hat is it? How should I interpret "the feels"? I still don't know...Enjoy... ENJOI... OI!!!